This post probably contains affiliate links, to items I am in love with, and I am confident you will too! For any health advice I give on nutrition and wieghtloss, make sure you check with your doctor, as I am not a health professional. I am just a mama with lots of health and fitness knowledge and experience.
There was a day when I would play Thomas the Train, orchestrate a major Dinosaur hunt, and race cars all over the house. I would narrate detailed stories and games, bringing my boys (mostly the oldest) into extravagant, make-believe worlds. Until, it had to stop.
I didn’t realize the amount of dependence/need I was promoting. I decided to stop playing with them when it hit me that I was cultivating an environment where their imagination needed my imagination, and I was tired.
I’m so happy I transitioned out of lead – player and into narrator, but it was a bit difficult. I felt so guilty saying no, then watching Benjamin struggle to know what to do with himself and his toys. The real ticker for me was knowing how much joy he got from our play time together. He was so happy.
But, the reality is my job isn’t to make them happy all the time, it’s to love them and nurture their minds.
His mind needed the challenge of coming up with his own games, directing his own play, and I finally realized that. So, I shed a few tears and felt the guilt each time he asked me to play.
I started off slowly by saying “no, mommy can’t play now. It’s Benjamin’s special time to play,” or “Benjamin, you have all these wonderful race cars they want you to help them go as fast as they can,” or “see the clock? You play til the big – hand is on the 12, then we’ll do something fun.”
The list goes on of all the impromptu statements to direct him back to his own games, and he slowly got better and better. I was so hesitant to do this!
Isn’t it my job to be his playmate too? Aren’t I supposed to interact with him more? Not always. We are adults, they are children, and it’s easy to blur the lines, especially with your first-born. Jack, my second-born, caught on to independent play immediately because he was younger when I started this movement, so he knows no different (thank goodness for me!).
This really took months of getting used too, as well as going to more parks and play dates to really use other kids for entertainment. Other kids are perfect for that, and they help teach your child how to play.
Now, I can bring the boys to new places, introduce them to new toys and they run into the fantastic world of their own imagination and fantasy. They are in charge of their own fun and entertainment (for the most part, with direction and guidance from me intermittently). Not playing with them has actually been one of the best gifts I’ve given them. I still of course sit down and play catch, show them how to build roads and castles, color, tickle, hide and chase. I want to be fun and silly with them, and a part of their world, but with balance.
Now I hear things like, “yea, that’s a good idea mom!” As he runs off to get his toys and play to his heart’s content. It’s fascinating the games and ideas they can come up with on their own, and it’s just in time because I’ve got just 10 days til due date for boy number 3! #ithinkimnutsbutcantwait
I have a very specialized program for postpartum mamas looking to heal, nourish and regain their strength. I really struggled healing after my first child, and even went through pelvic floor physical therapy for weeks to manage scar tissue that developed from tearing. I have experience studying nutrition, physical therapy and I taught Pilates, so I’ve put together a program I wish I would’ve followed from the beginning.
A program that first heals your body through specialized movements and nourishing foods. Foods are so essential to your body finding the nutrients it needs to put itself back together again. Your postpartum body needs special care in the first 4-6 weeks where you focus on regaining strength and properly fueling your body for breastfeeding.
Here is what one mama emailed me on the program:
“I absolutely love the program! Just got finished with workout 4 and I’m dying I can only do these 2x thru and my second round is pretty funny to see I’m sure! I will work up to 3x:-) By the way, your little boy angel in the videos is too precious and makes me smile! My boys have been doing these with me as well🏼!
This program then moves you into gaining physical fitness back. I will never forget the first time I tried to go for a run around 12 weeks postpartum after my first baby. I didn’t do any strength work, so I was literally jelly. I had lost all my extra fat and my previous muscle. So depressing. I was barely able to start gaining it back before I got pregnant and sick again with my second. I’ve learned so much on maintaining muscle postpartum through a unique diet and Pilates routines. I walk you through all of this too!
Lastly, I take you into a workout program to combine with a meal plan to help you lose the baby weight, not your milk!! !
I created this program to be affordable and realistic for new mams!