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Today, we start the Purpose For Your Pain series with Alyrical from Afromom. I received her piece, and I immediately knew this mom is a survivor full of faith and belief. What she has been through, and emerged from is astounding. Can you imagine losing your sight? Well a lot more was in store for her than that, as her story will tell.
Alyrical is a mother of courage and strength, who writes her stories on her blog. She is an open book and loves sharing her family’s life and adventures. She and her family are embracing the abundant life God blessed them with, while choosing creative, family-centered, and faith-filled living. All mixed in with a little crazy of course. She hopes to make readers feel like they are one of her neighborhood friends visiting with her family. Don’t forget to connect with her on Instagram, Twitter, Facebook and Snapchat: Alyricalart.
FAITH AND JOY IN THE UNSEEN
After I lost my sight back in 2012 I thought the biggest of my trails were over for sometime, at least health wise, but four years later I found my life revolving around doctors again. March of 2016 my husband and I were ecstatic about the news of expecting our second child in November. Feeling much more prepared and stable than my first pregnancy, I expected this to be a breeze, I decided I was going to make some changes during this pregnancy and delivery process, because of course I am a pro this time around, NOT!
Thinking that everything is going according to plan, I woke up to my husband in tears, utterly confused because he is not necessarily the overly emotional type, I knew what ever was happening had to be devastating. Bracing myself I inquired about what was wrong with him. In a panic he yelled “ME?! I just spent the past five minutes trying to wake you up you had a seizure! I thought YOU WERE GONE.” My mind began to race knowing that I don’t suffer from epilepsy and that I am still in the early stages of my pregnancy I was extremely concerned. I immediately texted my OB, who told me to go to the emergency room. After sitting in the ER for two days, with very little attention I was told all my test came back clear and was sent home, without seeing a neurologist. After follow-ups they had come to the conclusion that it may have been a one time situation, probably caused by stress or sleep deprivation, and that I shouldn’t be overly concerned. After a few days I went back to living a some what normal life, with my husband constantly watching and checking on me. Exactly thirty one days later I had not one but two seizures, this time waking up in an ambulance I saw a neurologist who diagnosed me with epilepsy and placed me on medication. The medication although helpful it came with a plethora of side effects, one of which was different forms of seizures. There were days I woke up on the floor and had no idea how I got there or how long I was there for. I was forced to fly down to Florida to be with my mom who could help me take care of my son and ensure I received the proper medical care, since she is in the profession. After being referred to multiple doctors I was constantly advised of the all the risk I could endure during delivery and birth defects our daughter could have due to my medication. So much so that I was told to only give birth at two different hospitals in the whole south Florida area. I finally saw the top high-risk OB in our county who admitted me in to the hospital at 22 weeks after discovering I was already dilated. Every time I had a gran-mal seizure the contraction of my muscles told my body I was in labor pushing my little princess to make her debut a few months early.
I spent the next three months surviving the strictest hospital bed rest, I wasn’t even allowed to use the restroom in my own room. I succumb to taking awkward sponge baths, painful sciatica, depression and a list of other things, all while still suffering from seizure disorder. When admitted I was told that I wouldn’t be leaving the hospital until I gave birth, probably by c-section which I didn’t want and preferably full term. I was doing well the first few weeks, but as time progressed I really began to grow into a funk, filled with worry and despite trying to walk in faith, fear. I missed my son, my husband who was still stuck in D.C. working, and my life in general. Despite how I felt on the inside, I did my best to hold it together and not allow my emotions or thoughts get the best of me.
Although this experience was one of the most difficult things I had to endure, the support I received from family and friends who are like family was beautiful. I had people come to my hospital room just to pray over me and my unborn child, friends who called me everyday, multiple times a day just to try and make my mind be somewhere else. I was surviving but I had become institutionalized by my journey and my surroundings.
One afternoon my doctor came in, while my husband was in town visiting and informed me that I had reached 34 weeks so I could be discharged. The feeling was so surreal, I almost didn’t want to leave, the hospital had become my prison, I mean home. Rolling down the hall way to freedom was indescribable because I hadn’t seen anything except that room for three months, or had fresh air or used my own legs. I was told to still be on strict bed rest, but it felt so good to be out that I couldn’t help but want to live my life as normal as possible. I was blessed to have amazing people around me to help take care of me and remind me when I was pushing myself too hard, whether I wanted to hear it or not.
A total of six months away from my husband and home, I kept reminding myself that there was a beautiful blessing I was going to meet at the end of this struggle. I am a true believer that everything happens for a reason, and through this struggle I have had so much growth, I am completely different person than I was 6 months ago. The greatest joy of all is that not only did I carry my baby to term, I was actually induced and delivered her naturally. She has only been here for a few weeks but the testimony she has given me has not only effected my life forever, but the lives of many. I still suffer from seizure disorder, but I really wouldn’t change this journey for anything in the world, it has been beyond beautiful and given me un-explainable happiness, through my miracle baby. “